President McDonalds J Parp has sensationally blamed all his problems with Russia on ex-national security adviser General Michael Flynn, including Apollo Creed's death in the ring at the hands of steroid abuser Ivan Drago at Trump's Las Vegas hotel in 1985.
In an interview with AIPAC leaders, who had absolutely no influence on the presidential election, McDonalds J Parp said, 'It was all Flynn. I tried to stop him, but he flushed my head down the toilet and said he'd make me cry in front of my staff if I didn't go along with him. I'm sorry. Please don't take my power away. I've done everything you asked. I mend your fires on Saturdays. I even managed to slip that tax bill through congress so you Jews won't have to pay anything. Look, I'll up the foreign aid to Israel. I'll invade Iran. I'll give you another one of my children. Anything....'
Flynn has been unable to be contacted since Friday night and it is thought that he has been digitised into the ENCOM mainframe by the MCP to play real-life arcade games for all eternity.