KOREA TO NUKE USA

It is thought that North Korea is building a nuclear arsenal to attack American banks and needs to be invaded to be on the safe side.

Oh I do love to be beside the seaside.

LITTLE SLANT-EYED RACIST NAZIS!

Two racist Chinky tourists were arrested yesterday for a-siegin' and a-heilin' outside the Reichstag in Berlin.

NATIONAL TRUST: ARSE-BANDITRY NO LONGER COMPULSORY

The National Trust have reversed a decision to make workers wear 'I am an arse bandit' badges.

HALF-CASTE HOMO NI PM: NO BORDERS

Semi-wog knob jockey Northern Ireland Prime Minister Leo Varadkar has declared the NI border will be like his anal cavity after Brexit: often penetrated.

Varadkar Top Right

SKYNET AND ZUCK DEFEATED....FOR NOW

The Zuck's army of Facebook robots have been defeated, we can reveal.

SCARAMOUCHE FIRED

President Donald J Parp has sensationally shouted 'You're fired!' to Apprentice candidate and token midget Anthony Scaramouche, after the poison dwarf bard's string of vulgar ditties about members of Parp's cabinet.

Anthony Scaramouche has been put back in his box

POLISH VICTIM AGGRESSIVELY EATING PIZZA

The Polish drunkard who was killed by a teen of undisclosed ethnicity was allegedly aggressively and racistly eating pizza, Chelmsford Crown Court heard yesterday.

Racist Polak fascist Mr Jozwik